missing u all the time

Dear b,

I don't know if u have read my blog or not but the truth is even when I say I want to forget about you my heart still refuse to. I really am missing u. I guess it is true like everyone says. One he get what he wants he will leave you. So now you are going to ignore me and leave me. Sigh! I felt like a bitch that stupidly fell in love with u.

why cant u b alittle more caring for me

Really? U could not even bother to do anything for me after all that I have give in. I know I am stupid. I just wish it was not this way. I really wish it was something else. Why can't u show me u care for me. U want me. Why can't I get ur full attention. I am so disappointed with u and myself. I sometimes really wish I didn't know u

let go and forget

Dear b,

Maybe it is time for me to let u go. Since u have been so cold to me for the past one year. All those times we had made it so hard for me to let u go. I cannot stop thinking about u every day wondering how is ur day. But I know there is No place for me in ur heart she is more important than anyone else. I don't deny you are the jerk that I fell for and will always loved even when we are not meant to be together. I will b there when u need me

broken heart

Dear b,

you may not know it breaks my heart everytime i see her post pictures of both of your memories. i really wish it would b me and you. but i know it will never b because you are too far away from me. you made it a point to go there to b with her. not to b with me. sometimes i really wonder did you every like me or am i just your fling? i really dont know who am i to you. just a friend with benefits that soon to happen? really should i wait for you? i dont know all i know i am broken now.

happy new year

it is new year yet i only have one wish is to see you everyday though i know you are pulling yourself away from me. you will always be hers and not mine. i just wish for the last time i get to see you. no matter what i do i know nothing can change. i shall learn to forget about you

feeling scared and sad

Dear B,

i know i have no rights to be scared or sad about this but everytime when i see pictures of it or thought about it makes me feel every scared. i am very scared one day you will tell me you are getting married with her. i will feel devastated. no matter how i tried to let you go. i still miss you. still want you. still feel something is deeply missing when you are not present. although i may not know how to express myself when you are around but deep down in my heart i really want you. i know we have not spend the best time together but i really love you. maybe you are using me for your advantage but the truth is i really really love you that is why i am always giving and not receiving anything. no matter how many new people i met no one can replace you in my heart. i will always miss you and love you.

my wish for christmas

Dear Santa,

i know i have not been a good girl for the whole year and i do not deserve to get this wish from you but i really want this wish. this one and only wish that i have wished every year but it did not come true. is it because we are really not meant to be? is it because i am meant to find someone better than this person. my only wish is i get to see and spend time with him for chirstmas. but i really dont believe you will make my wish come true because i am not allowed to love this person nor share my ups and downs with this person. he is already taken. i should just let him go and find someone who would treat me better. till i find someone else i really wish i will have him for christmas.

PY